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Winter Wunderland

A bitterly cold winter, the people of Minneapolis are battling snow and ICE.

It turns out we libs have been afraid of the wrong bogeyman. We have feared MAGA, when the real blackguard is the Department of Homeland Security being converted into a domestic thugocracy.

There are 3,000 Department of Homeland Security agents deployed across Minnesota at this time, some from CBP, Customs and Border Protection, and others from ICE, Immigration and Customs Enforcement. They are making daily arrests and sometimes they shoot people.

What surprises me is the lack of discipline among the ICE troops. When I see a video of an ICE agent approaching a vehicle, exclaiming “Open the door! Open the door! Open the fucking door!” I am appalled. This angry profanity is not standard police procedure. I have been yelled at by a police officer for exiting my vehicle at a traffic stop, but I have never been cussed out.

When a fellow ICE officer on that icy street in Minneapolis then unholstered his pistol and shot Ms. Renée Good dead, this strikes me as an unnecessary escalation of a situation which— had cooler heads prevailed— could have been resolved in a very different fashion.

Once upon a time, I was a U.N. peacekeeper. We encountered annoying sniper fire and constant disappointment, which got on our nerves. We were sent to carry out a specific mission and we never seemed to reach our goal. Occasionally in our brigade, one of my fellow soldiers would spit out a hate-filled rant over one or another of the combatants whom we had been sent to pacify. It always caught me off-guard to encounter so much anger, but professional soldiers, we never let our emotions color our actions. That may sound like a categorical denial of human nature, but it’s true: Angry and disgruntled, we still treated our contact with the locals with utmost caution. The last thing we wanted to do was get in a firefight with those people.

In Minneapolis, seventeen days after the Renée Good debacle, there was a second killing. This time it was a dude named Alex Pretti, a male intensive care nurse employed by the Veterans Administration. When he went to help a female demonstrator who had been knocked to the ground, a hodgepodge of agents from the U.S. Customs and Border Protection agency and ICE’s Homeland Security Investigations unit piled atop 37-year-old Alex. Disarming him of his legally licensed handgun, two agents of the Border Patrol then fatally shot him, firing ten or more rounds within five seconds.

Gaslighting the voters, White House deputy chief of staff Stephen Miller claimed Pretti was an assassin who tried to murder the federal agents. A half dozen videos taken from various angles show something completely different. A scrum in rugby perhaps.

“I don’t know of any peaceful protester that shows up with a gun and ammunition rather than a sign,” said Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem, defending the actions of the government agents. Noem blames Minnesota Governor Tim Walz and Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey for using inflammatory rhetoric to fan protest in the state. She also claims that Renée Good committed an “act of domestic terrorism.” The videos show Renée was driving away in her car at 5 mph, her wife Becca next to her in the front seat and her dog in the back, which makes it hard to understand exactly what kind of terrorism Kristi Noem has in mind.

According to mainstream media, Department of Homeland Security officers have fired shots 16 times since July, either while making arrests or at people protesting their operations.   

ILHAN OMAR, member of the House of Representatives from Minnesota’s 5th district, has called for Kristi Noem to be impeached and for ICE to be abolished.   

Since everybody and his brother is writing reams about ICE in Minnesota, I want to raise two issues that seldom get mentioned. Where are the ICE agents housed? Barracks bitching often leads to gross public behavior. Angry soldiers don’t exit the airplane angry, their frustration and anger is a boots-on-the-ground reaction to daily confrontation with an unruly public. The antisemites of my youth got infected with that attitude every evening at the family dinner table. Hearing their fathers badmouth the Jews, they felt empowered to beat the crap out of us Jewish kids.

The ICE agent jumping in his van in the morning has spent an evening listening to complaints from his fellow ICEmen, stoking his anger and giving him a very negative view of his urban environment. At what motel or National Guard depot are these people staying? Where do these people go to eat? What kind of leadership are they being given around the dinner table and what are they being told regarding the day’s events? Is a total trainwreck being met with a pat on the back and a reminder that DHS agents have total immunity from prosecution while carrying out their duties?

Noem complains that ICE agents are being harassed at their hotels and in local restaurants. She also claims that their families have come under threat. Well d’uh? You run around all day in masks, carrying guns, arresting people, then you find the locals have a negative view of your activities? Gee, I wonder why.

My second question regards the protesters. Who are these people and how do they have so much time on their hands? We had a major snowfall in the Washinton, DC area last Sunday. Even worse, the snow was followed by rain and sleet, forming a crust of ice atop the snow. This makes for great “snowcrete,” blocks of ice perfect for building an igloo. Unfortunately, they weigh a ton. Hacking these ice blocks on my driveway into manageable chunks and piling them in my yard, my back is killing me. Listen, any of you demonstrators in Minneapolis are welcome to grab a snow shovel or an axe, jump a plane and join me here in Maryland! I’ll supply the hot coffee and the overnight stay.

Yes, I understand why the demonstrators are recording the ICE agents’ nefarious activities. I applaud their civic engagement. They are providing an invaluable record of the heinous b.s. being perpetrated by ICE. I am just curious about their domestic situation. How do they manage to free up time in the middle of the day to engage in civil disobedience? They can’t all be nepo babies or night workers.

Without wading into the debate about fascist brown shirts within ICE or whether Kristi Noem is a danger to American democracy, I will simply say that 90% of ICE activity in Minneapolis looks suspiciously unconstitutional. If the video record is any indication, the right to gather in public protest, the right to free speech, constitutional protection against illegal search and seizure as well as the sanctity of the home are all being violated. The Trump administration’s smoke and mirrors pseudo-justifications do not change the facts on the ground: White American protesters are getting shot dead by federal agents in a hail of bullets.      

Tariff Hell

While Elon Musk chainsaws the federal bureaucracy, firing people left and right, “saving” the American taxpayer millions, Trump’s policies are going to raise the national debt by trillions. Penny wise and pound foolish.

A trade war with America’s most prolific trading partners isn’t going to end well for America. “They’re ripping us off,” complains the president, but when he took office, unemployment was at 4% and we had a robust economy. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Trump has experienced multiple bankruptcies, only this time, when he bankrupts America, there won’t be any small claims court to bail us out.      

Maybe Trump is just playing with us and isn’t really going to place 25% tariffs on foreign auto parts. He has the playfulness of a child and follows his instincts, so we never know what to expect from one week to the next.

Americans in the heartland love their automobiles. They are not going to be happy when tariffs drive up auto prices, adding $10,000 in sticker shock to new cars. Most dealerships have enough stock on hand to cover sales for 60 to 90 days, but after that, we’ll be living in a world of tariff autos.   

As soon as prices fly through the roof, the American people are going to be furious.

I call most Trump supporters “kitchen table Republicans,” people who sit at the kitchen table in the evening and try to get the household budget to add up. Perennially strapped for cash, they cannot afford to have inflation reduce their purchasing power. These are the voters who blamed the Dems for the rising cost of gasoline and groceries.  

If they were furious with Biden over higher gas prices, just wait while Trump screws up trade with Canada and Mexico. The pendulum is going to swing. Violently.

This is what happens when you populate the highest echelons of government with billionaires. They couldn’t care less about ordinary people who are struggling to make ends meet.

God have mercy on America. Trump won’t.

American Roulette

Happy February!

In recent weeks, the Trump Administration has laid off tens of thousands of federal employees across numerous agencies. Lacking constitutional authority, Elon Musk and his assistants at the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) continue their effort to dismantle the federal workforce without any clear analysis of the impact. Federal agencies and the American people will suffer devastating consequences.

Since more than 80% of federal employees live outside of the Washington DC area, the effects of these “large-scale reductions in force” will be felt in communities across the country and reduce the effectiveness of government operations.

These layoffs follow a 77,000-person reduction in the size of the federal workforce via acceptance of Musk’s “deferred resignation” offer: Employees who signed the agreement will receive pay until September, while no longer being required to work.

There are timebombs.  

Musk and his U.S. DOGE Service have fired 400 federal workers at the Department of Homeland Security. Two hundred of those cuts are Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) employees. Good luck when the next hurricane floods the South, the next snowpocalypse snarls the East Coast, California burns to the ground or terrorists blow up our cities.

What will happen to our food and medicine when Trump hollows out the Food and Drug Administration?

Where will we get vaccine to fight the next pandemic when Trump/Musk terminate research funding by Executive Order?

Layoffs at the Federal Aviation Administration make flying that much more dangerous.      

Awaiting a tax return? With tax season looming, the IRS has cut nearly 6,000 newly hired employees, representing about 7% of its workforce.

DOGE has dismissed dozens of probationary federal employees at the Department of Education. Considering how MAGA supporters attack the curriculum at our schools and libraries, these turbulent times bode ill for our children’s education.

DOGE has reduced the Small Business Administration staff by 720 employees— approximately 20% of its workforce— while inflation rises and bird flu sends egg and chicken prices skyrocketing. Since February 2022, over 150 million chickens have been killed to stop the spread of the H5N1 epidemic. No longer profitable, many restaurants have been forced to close.

While Musk and his minions chainsaw their way through a supposedly bloated bureaucracy, more than 10,000 United States Agency for International Development (USAID) staff have been placed on administrative leave, abandoning aid programs around the world. With USAID funds frozen, $500 million in food has been left rotting in ports and warehouses.

No longer a beacon of democracy, America can expect foreign adversaries to attack. How will America defend itself when Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth has fired the career leadership at the Pentagon?

More than 1,000 Department of Veteran Affairs employees have been dismissed, including some working at the Veterans Crisis Hotline, leaving soldiers and military veterans like me who are suffering from PTSD to fend for ourselves, always a ticking timebomb.

The good news is that north of the border, 250,000 Canadians have signed a petition demanding that their government rescind Elon Musk’s Canadian citizenship. Shazam!     

On its website, DOGE has claimed savings to date of $65 billion, but offered no explanation for why some previous items have been removed or how it had arrived at this total. A “wall of receipts” is the only public ledger the organization has produced to document its work. Riddled with errors, this “wall” calls into question the veracity of DOGE’s claim. Karoline Leavitt, the White House press secretary, has said in a written statement that the cost-cutting initiative “has already identified billions of dollars in savings.” Do tell.

Buzzing chainsaw DOGE axed roughly 2,000 Department of Energy employees, including those who worked for the critical National Nuclear Security Administration. The Trump Administration quickly reversed the layoffs, after learning how critical those jobs are to the security of our nuclear arsenal. D’oh?

It’s amateur night at Trump casino. Good luck!

This blog post is based partly on data from NARFE, the National Active and Retired Federal Employees Association.

Biden Pardons Hunter

This is the THIRD TIME since its creation in November 2019 that my blog showcases the realPfft chestnut “Influence Peddling?”

God help us! The Biden clan strikes again. Whenever anyone during the next four years criticizes the Trump administration for being a cesspool of corruption— blah blah blah— they’ll get a side-eye and the two-word response “Hunter Biden.”

A real piece of work, President Joe Biden— the gift that keeps on giving— has pardoned his son Hunter, a major league screw-up who pleaded guilty to nine federal tax charges and was convicted of three felony counts for lying on a federal firearms application.

Ouch!

To quote Google: “In the U.S. criminal tax case against Hunter Biden, prosecutors allege he accepted payments from Romanian businessman Gabriel Popoviciu to influence U.S. government agencies regarding a criminal probe in Romania. Hunter Biden has pleaded guilty on September 5, 2024 to tax evasion and related charges.”

Why the president has the power to grant pardons has always been a total mystery to me. Yes, Article II, Section 2, Clause 1 of the Constitution assigns the president the power to “grant Reprieves and Pardons for Offenses against the United States, except in Cases of Impeachment,” but it just invites cronyism and corruption.

Even making allowances for the questionable paintings which Hunter created and sold for $1.5 million or the $6.5 million in loans which he received from Joe Biden buddy Kevin Morris, the smell of corruption hangs heavy over Hunter’s actions.  

And now his daddy has pardoned him! Well, fuck me! Yes, Joe is a doddering old cuss, but he does have a staff— and his wife Jill— who one assumes are reasonably clear-headed. The optics are so effing terrible, there are no words strong enough to express the public disgust and condemnation.

I know that Joe is vain and wants his place in the history books, but I don’t know if “hopelessly corrupt old geezer” is the label he most desires.

Congrats to the Demoncrats as they hit still another stinkeroo outta the ballpark! 

Why Trump?

This election wasn’t really about Donald Trump. He was always there, a storm cloud rumbling anger and grievance, but at least everyone knew who he is and what he represents. There were few surprises. Call it the white backlash.

If you are unhappy with Trump’s election, I blame the Democrats’ inability to field a decent candidate.

Loyalty and laziness.

Out of loyalty, the Democrats kept hidden the fact that Biden should be in an Old Folks Home where he can get the care he needs.

Out of laziness, they adopted the old saw that a sitting vice president should get the chance to run for president if the incumbent withdraws from the race.

The Biden-Trump debate took place at the end of June. The Democratic Convention was held in Chicago in the middle of August. Biden insisted he would not withdraw, but I expected the party leadership to investigate alternatives and have an open convention.

The problem was finding a blemish-free candidate. All nice people and dyed-in-the-wool Democrats, each came with baggage. Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer is terrific, but America is not going to elect a woman president. Pennsylvania Governor Josh Shapiro is a gem, but America is not going to elect a Jewish president. A dozen others lacked sufficient name recognition for such a short campaign. So everybody fell in line behind Kamala Harris.

A Hail Mary Pass, she had three strikes against her from the outset. A woman. A black. A California lib. We see that clearly because Trump won both the Electoral College and the popular vote by a wide margin. The voters rejected the candidacy of Kamala Harris. Period.

America is not racist, but after eight years of being under Obama’s spell, Americans were still smarting over a black president.

Bad timing, this was the wrong election for the Dems to go into the laboratory and cook up a hybrid candidate.

God have mercy on the USA!

     

BAM! Goes America 

It’s a fact, I get zero pleasure out of an assassination attempt on Donald J. Trump. As a concept, it sucks. Totally. Ever since the assassinations of John F. Kennedy, Bobby Kennedy and Martin Luther King, political violence has cast a shadow over my view of America. This is a violent country with too many guns. The courts do this, the courts do that, okaying bump stocks and finding gunmen acted in self-defense, but that doesn’t change the reality on the ground: School shootings and festival massacres lurk like a backdrop to our daily lives. Even with my military background, I find that every single one of these shootings makes me feel sick to my stomach.

I don’t wish to fuel conspiracy theories, but I do want to point out that there is a pattern among the perpetrators. Why should this lone-wolf shooting be any different from the others that preceded it? I expect that we will find:

The gunman acted alone.

The neighbors found the gunman to be quiet and withdrawn, hardly making a ripple in the social life of the neighborhood.

The gunman was white.

The gunman’s parents say he had become angry and depressed.

The gunman purchased his weapon at a gun show within the last three weeks.

When the authorities check his abode, they will find notebooks filled with angry rants.

The authorities will find angry rants online which the gunman posted on dark sites, but no one noticed as a tragedy unfolded.

Right now, the gunman’s motive remains unclear. We’ll see what the investigation reveals.

A typical speculation which I am already hearing is that Trump did this to himself to garner sympathy and votes. I disagree. Watching the video, you see how shocked the former president was. Getting shot came as very unwelcome news to him. It’s a hell of a note, but the raw drama of an assassination attempt will kick the Trump campaign into high gear.

 Looking at the photos, Trump now has his “Washington Crossing the Delaware” moment. Blood on his face, surrounded by Secret Service agents, an American flag waving in the background, he defiantly shakes his fist at his enemies. It’s a classic photo.

The press will focus on the gunman, while the real story is the reaction of Trump’s supporters. At the rally in Butler, Pennsylvania, the crowd immediately turned their fury on the reporters and television crews, blaming their coverage for this act of political violence.

When judging the level of an armed conflict, gunfire is an inflection point, leading to clear “before” and “after” scenarios. With the first shot fired, there is no putting the evil genie back in the lamp.

Even during the melee and destruction of the January 6th storming of the U.S. Capitol, there was no gunfire. No shots were fired outside the Capitol, among the crowd. Police explained that they purposely avoided gunfire, since they knew that the demonstrators were armed and a gunfight would lead to a bloodbath.

This craven act in Pennsylvania could be the first shot in an escalating series of politically violent occurrences, as America struggles with its Wild West heritage.                     

Naturally, Trump and his supporters are angry. You don’t poke a stick at a tiger. There is the risk of violent reprisals.

Flirting with the Devil

“You waved to me from the train, all blond and blue-eyed, your pale skin ruddy from the cold.” This was my grandfather Mordechai as a teenager writing to Trudi, his one great love. His devotion to her overshadowed the love he felt for my grandmother. Indeed, it overshadowed his love of anything else in life. I liken Mordechai to a radio receiver that could only receive one frequency. In his case, the other-worldly signal from Trudi’s brain, an electric motor that generated a signal strong enough to give some people actual headaches. It’s all in the love letters which she and my grandfather wrote to one another.

I emphasize the Russian side of our family, but we are also Feingolds, aus Deutschland. People who came from Germany to Sweden and, eventually, America.

Rosa, my Mutter, passed away a year and a half ago. In liquidating her estate, I have come upon a lot of greeting cards with the kind of heavy, Jewish decorative art that I learned to abhor in my youth. Arthur Szyk is a modern example of the genre. Among other things in the safe deposit box, there was this crumbling stack of letters tied in brown string. Old, from the Second World War, with German stamps and postmarks from her side and Swedish stamps and postmarks from his, the letters are in Berliner Dialekt. Written in Fraktur script, the handwriting is decipherable, but a bear to get used to. Why mom held on to her father-in-law’s youthful indiscretion, I’ll never understand, other than that she liked Mordechai.

In Berlin on business in the middle of April— Spring in the air— I took the letters with me to a philologist named Siegfried who I found online. Dare I say it? You can find anything in Berlin. I emailed Siegfried a few weeks before my trip and was amazed to receive a ready and rapid reply. He would see me. He lives on the second floor of a tan five-story apartment house on Barfusstraße in Wedding, a block from Schillerpark. Spirited, with a glint in his eye, a white beard and a gnarled face, he is in his late 80’s, one of that strange breed born prior to World War Two.

“Your parents named you Siegfried,” I blurted, shaking his hand vigorously, feeling my face go red. That was the effect he had on me. “Your name means victory and peace,” I added.

“It’s of no importance,” he assured me. “If it bothered me, I would have changed it, but it doesn’t bother me.”

“Oh, okay,” I agreed, watching him close and lock the front door before disappearing into the kitchen to make us coffee. In Germany, coffee is a must.

The walls of his study are filled with German expressionist paintings and woodcuts from the 1920’s. They must be worth their weight in gold! Serving the coffee, he read aloud from several of the letters, chuckling with amazement at their childish sentiments.

“They’re love letters by young people,” I explained lamely.

Siegfried gave me a fuller picture of Trudi’s train ride than I could piece together with my limited German. It was March of 1938. Trudi and her parents were leaving Berlin for Rostock, nearer the Baltic coast, where they spent the war.

Together with online searches, we could also deduce that Trudi’s father, Hans Schmitz, a somewhat overwrought Berliner, worked for the Reichsbahn, the state railway. So he never ended up in the Wehrmacht fighting on the Eastern Front. From his perch on the Baltic Sea, it was easy for Hans to turn a blind eye to the cattle cars loaded with Jews heading east to the concentration camps. A typical railway man, he looked upon politics as a disease and considered Hitler to be his own worst enemy. Hans turned down a promotion to Gauleiter, district chief, because it would have required him to join the Nazi Party. Trudi went to school, where they knitted socks for the troops, collected clothing for the Winter Relief and sent care packages to the front.

Quaint.

Rostock got bombed mercilessly. After the war, it became East Germany’s major seaport.

When Kristallnacht struck in November of 1938, the Night of Broken Glass, a pogrom against the Jews, the Feingolds signed over 95% of their possessions to the Nazis and decamped to Malmö in Sweden where my great-grandfather taught at the university. His expertise was ancient civilizations, which immediately put him at loggerheads with National Socialist mythology regarding swastika sun symbols and the qualities of the so-called Aryan race. The Nazis were only too happy to banish der Professor from the Reich. He was exactly the kind of intellectual Jew who made Hitler’s blood boil.  

Den Teufel,” sighed Siegfried.

“The Devil?” I asked.

“You are American.”

“Yes, that’s right, Swedish-American. Growing up, my parents sent me to live—”

“Of course,” he barked, as if broken families were as common as dirt. “What interests me is the current state of America. Do you feel that you are flirting with a devil by allowing Trumpf to run for a second term?”

“Ah… um…” I stammered, caught off guard.

“That’s why I agreed to see you!” he harrumphed, which was okay with me, but unexpected. I took a clunk of cold coffee and gathered my thoughts.

“It’s a case of domestic politics,” I explained carefully. “There are all these politicians pooping…”

“Yes?” he asked, amused.

Thinking in a jumble of German, Swedish and English, I was having trouble expressing myself. “These politicians are screwing around. Chiefly Mitch McConnell, minority leader of the Senate, but yeah, it’s a handful of people who are oblivious to history and afraid of getting shot by Trump’s supporters. Every opportunity they have to put a stop to Trump’s candidacy, like three blind mice, they don’t do it,” I ended with an embarrassed chuckle. Why did I have to bring up mice, for God’s sake?   

“What about Biden?” Siegfried asked, making the name sound like two words.

“Megalomania,” I explained. “Egocentricity. Aware of his age, he promised in 2020 to only run for one term. He claimed he was a transitional president, a bridge to the younger generation. But when push comes to shove, his high regard for himself has convinced him that he can win reelection. A nice gramps, but really, really old and doddering,” I concluded. “It’s not that the Republicans are so strong, it’s that the Democrats are so weak.”

“I keep reading that in the German press,” Siegfried replied, taking out a meerschaum pipe and filling it with tobacco from a tin. “Do you identify as Jewish?”

“Very much so.”

“So, what do you think of the war?”

“A tragedy for all concerned, on the ground in Israel, Gaza and the West Bank,” I said, more sure of my opinion. “Hamas is playing the West for fools. First they murder the Israelis and then they stir up pro-Palestinian, anti-Israel sentiment among young people all around the world. They are winning the propaganda war, which sucks.”

“Let’s go outside. I want to smoke,” Siegfried insisted. Standing with me on the front walk, lighting his pipe with a fancy silver lighter and billowing clouds of white smoke, he asked if I had considered moving to Israel.

“I am considering it. I never expected the American public to turn on me, but I am a student of history. I see America reenacting all the same mistakes as Nazi Germany in the 1930’s.”

“I lived through one world war, I don’t want to live through another,” Siegfried declared, shaking his head. “The Russians are breathing down our necks. You Americans need to stop flirting with the Devil and get your act together.”

Hunter’s Blues

Da capo. Again. “Influence Peddling” is a tune which the Swedish rap band realPfft released in November, 2019. Hunter Biden’s never-ending soap opera breathes new life into this chestnut.

I have been keeping the Hunter Biden swamp at arm’s length. It’s a cocktail of egomania, self-centered greed, immaturity, careless foolishness, stupidity and lack of a moral compass.

Not good.

Hunter’s apologists explain that he was battling drug addiction, depression and alcoholism. Mental illness and mental anguish are terrible afflictions to behold, but neither constitutes a Get Out of Jail Free card.  

Where were the adults in the room? Joe Biden limits his knowledge of the events to a claim that he asked his son Hunter if Hunter knew what he was doing and Hunter said yes, he did.

If you are going to be this irresponsible as a parent, you deserve to reap the consequences. America is not known as a stupid country, but there is a streak of mulish stupidity in the Bidens’ behavior that is miles wide.

The “d’oh” dumbness isn’t limited to the Bidens. Just look at the mess America’s 45th president has created for himself. These people need a dog collar and someone to pull on the leash whenever they venture too close to the nearest cliff. What is wrong with these people? Taylor Swift’s drama queen persona resembles Albert Einstein in comparison to this gluttony of ineptitude.

This is another good reason for the Democratic Party to retire Joe and Kamala after four years of White House service and choose a different pair of candidates for president and vice president in 2024.

 

Truly Dense

People who have followed my blog know that I take great civic pride in our Township of Oxburg in the state of Maryland. Incorporated in the 1950’s, we have a rich, west side of town and a poorer east side, separated by the famous 1812 Highway, a sunken road from the War of 1812. Ever since I was born, my family has lived on West 3rd Street. We try not to be snooty, but we are only human. We are proud to live on the right side of the highway, the “right side of the tracks”!

Now after 50 years of relative tranquility, despite America’s endless wars, the threat of climate change, Maryland and DC politics and the cultural war, I am sad to announce that members of the Oxburg Town Council have lost their minds!

In their thirst for more tax revenue, they have opted for greater population density in Oxburg by abolishing the zoning restrictions that have kept Oxburg a community of single-family homes. “Multi-family homes of up to six units are the wave of the future and will be allowed on existing lots,” they have announced. “Portland, Oregon is our role model. If they can do it in Portland and South Carolina and other such places, we should follow their lead and expand affordable housing in Oxburg.”

Portland, Oregon. Homeless people and feces-on-the-sidewalk Portland. When my younger brother Tim, who is an airline pilot, flies into PDX, the airline puts the crew up in a motel over the bridge in Vancouver, Washington, since Portland has become untenable.   

“You are talking about architectural monstrosities springing up on suburban streets,” I have argued. “Twenty years ago, the Town Council insisted on allowing McMansions and we have had to live with that ever since. But to build mini-apartment houses in the middle of suburban neighborhoods is crazy. That is not what Oxburg is all about!”

Up until now, we have had zoning restrictions that prohibited the building of anything beyond a one-family home. You couldn’t even rent out your basement to a live-in tenant. Oxburg has been notoriously suburban that way, block after block of Levittown style homes. Yes, we are a throwback to the 1950’s, but hey, we like it that way!

When I say zoning restrictions, I mean rules that have been as strict as the decorum in a third-grade classroom. Any homeowner wishing to add on a bedroom or porch to their house has gone through purgatory. The Oxburg Zoning Board is notorious for arriving on the scene of a planned addition with tape measure in hand and declaring, “Wait a minute! The overhang of the roofline is going to be three inches too close to the property line and two inches too close to the street. You’ll have to get the contractor to redraw the plans.” Everybody has been through it. We have the gray hairs to show for it!

Why this sudden change? “Diversity!” the libs claim. “Housing prices are so expensive in Oxburg, Blacks cannot afford to live here!” This is their Culture Warrior chant.

To them, I say, “What about Cannon Hill and East 5th Street, two neighborhoods that are predominantly Black? Those families live in single-family homes just like everybody else. They don’t want multi-family architectural monstrosities springing up in their neighborhoods either!”

The white liberals’ argument about fair housing is particularly annoying, as I have friends who live in those Black neighborhoods, while the lily-white proponents of greater population density do not.

“George Floyd was killed, so America needs to re-evaluate our racist past!” chant the liberals. I mean, these are members of the Democratic Party, they are supposed to be the Good Guys! Having drunk the Kool-Aid, they have gone deaf. The only voices they hear are their own.

You know, I was the Yard Sign Guy for the Anna Bola campaign way back in 2011 and through my clever use of yard signs, I dare say I helped swing the electorate. Hey, she won the election! In the past six months, at the hearings held by the Town Council, all these proponents of multi-family housing have marched into the Meeting Room waving the same effing red yard signs. Ugh!

Justice = Fair Housing

Freedom to Choose!

Stop racist housing!

Demand housing reform!

NOW!

it says on the yard signs they wave in our faces, we who like Oxburg the way it is and always has been.

“Old fuddy-duddy,” they call me and stick out their tongues.

I guess I am supposed to be glad that they haven’t doxed me or resorted to telephone terror. Still, it’s frustrating when westsiders have hopped on the greater population density bandwagon and refuse to see our viewpoint or even meet us halfway.

This is what happens in post-Trump America when well-meaning liberals get a bee in their bonnet.

“I take this very personally,” I told the Town Council when it was my turn to speak for two and a half minutes. “Just down the street from us, a developer has purchased a single-story yellow brick house over a year ago and let it just sit. ‘Why doesn’t he tear down and build?’ my neighbors and I wondered. Now we get it! He’s waiting for you to pass this legislation, so he can build a six-family architectural monstrosity 200 feet from my front door. My property value is going to plummet, since prospective home buyers won’t want to live down the street from an architectural monstrosity.”

“That’s the purpose of the program,” explained the Town Council Chairman. “To lower housing prices so middle-income families can afford to live here.”

So much for using my home collateral as my nest egg when I retire. Cripes!

“You should be glad that we are honest enough to admit our intentions,” the Chairman lectured me, sitting up there on the podium together with the four other members of the Town Council. “When the FBI relocates to Landover, we want to get a piece of that. New workers will come streaming into the area. Why should Oxburg get shut out of a housing boom just because you don’t happen to like it?”

Money talks.

“You’ll still get top dollar for the house and the land,” my brother Tim has counseled me. “All you need to do is sell to a crooked developer who wants to build Aesop’s Pyramid on our lot.” Since ours is the biggest lot in the neighborhood, Tim has a point. Morally repugnant, but a point none-the-less.          

My Mom Is Gone

Hello.

I live in Oxburg, Maryland in the USA. The town is named after Calvinist John Ox who settled in Catholic Maryland during Colonial times and owned vast tracts of land in this part of the state.

“Why doesn’t he write?” You may well ask. “Värför skriver han inte?” in Swedish. “Pourquoi est-ce qu’il n’écrit pas?” in French.

My mama Rosa Feingold, 81 years old, has passed on to a better place. She had been losing weight, got a staph infection, ended up in the hospital and died. When my phone rang at 10:10 pm on a rainy Thursday night, an orderly told me in hushed tones that Rosa was gone. I grabbed a Hebrew prayer book and drove to the hospital, where the nurses had laid mom out in a respectful position and turned down the lights. They left me alone with her. I said the prayers for the dead right there at bedside and spoke to her in English, Yiddish, French and Swedish. All her known languages.

The burial got a little complicated because the family plot is north of New York City and, unlike with my dad 25 years ago, I didn’t have the energy to jump in the car and drive four and a half hours to attend to mom’s funeral. Instead, I buried her long-distance.

The local funeral home was terrific. They knew and followed the Jewish burial rites, wrapping the body in a white shroud and placing it in a plain wood coffin with a Star of David on the lid. They got a little flummoxed when the Jewish cemetery in New York was closed for both Shabbat and the following Monday for a Jewish holiday. Jim, the local funeral director, wanted to know how much the cemetery charges to receive the body, open the grave, inter the coffin and close the grave. He had visions— based on bad experiences, no doubt— of the driver arriving in New York with the coffin, being told “We gotta be paid, otherwise, no burial” and driving the coffin back to Maryland. Not fun.

That meant postponing the burial still another day, which was super stressful for me, since we are supposed to get the body into the ground as soon as possible. It was a relief when interment took place six days after she died. Like, hooray! Bye, momsaleh! Rest in peace.

A wreck, I sat shiva five days. The neighbors brought me food, also a Jewish tradition. Jag sörjde, I mourned.

That’s where I’ve been.          

Taking care of my mom these last few months took up virtually all my time, a fact which only becomes apparent in hindsight. I loved her. The dutiful son, I lived with her and took care of her.

My younger brother Tim— the loving son— parachuted in whenever his schedule allowed, but he’s in training for a promotion and, as the crisis arose, he couldn’t provide the 24-7 backup which he and I had originally envisioned. Instead, we conferenced every night by phone. Tremendously helpful, this was not the same as a physical presence. He felt terrible about it, but hey, I want him to get the promotion. Mom wanted him to get the promotion!

Reality rarely fulfills the dream.

The midterm elections are soon upon us (November 8th, a Tuesday) and whatever I say, it can and will be held against me. As Google tells us, “all 435 seats in the House of Representatives and 35 of the 100 seats in the Senate will be contested.” You gotta laugh! As if the country doesn’t have enough problems. The economy is tanking. We have a clueless old fogey as president who means well but can’t deliver. Trump’s supporters are toting guns. The Republicans have a handful of crazies running for office and the Democratic slate ain’t exactly any damn good, including stutterers, gun-shy officials up for re-election and blacks running in lily white states.

Not too cool.

I’m writing to let you know that I am still around. As new days dawn, you will be hearing more from me. Coming attractions: Mutte Fjutt in Uppsala, Sweden and Clive have composed a song entitled “Morsan,” mother in Swedish, but I haven’t had the juice to involve myself in releasing it. I’m still knee-deep in paperwork and recuperating.

Something to look forward to.

Take care, be well and keep your mask on, there’s a new variant out there and it’s a baddie.

Yours, Kev