yustyoking

     A Buddhist lady friend and her husband suggested I put this in writing.

     I don’t want to open a can of worms, but I will say this about U.N. Peacekeeping: Soldiers get tired. We refuse to spend our entire tour being afraid. Combating our fear is exhausting. The hours are long, the work is exacting, combat is no fun.

     Tempers grow short in such dangerous surroundings.

     The natives, the locals, are also angry and afraid. It’s a war.

     Acting as the field negotiator, the liaison, between the two often pulled me apart, emotionally if not physically. The rest of the Command felt I was “going native” wherever we ended up. The locals felt I didn’t support them enough. Nobody was satisfied, but I did what I could to sooth tempers on all sides.

     A Buddhist, I used “instant bonding” to join myself with the soul of each individual, free of their current anger and frustration. This helped translate their wants and needs into productive solutions.

     There’s nothing mystical about it, other soldiers sit down and drink tea with tribal elders, with similar results.

     The fact that the villagers were screaming in my face, spittle flying, voices screeching, never bothered me. I didn’t enjoy the occasional headbutt I received from an unhappy petitioner. At that point, the guards would quickly intervene and subdue the fellow. My feeling—beneath my immediate anger—was that anyone who had gotten himself so steamed up, probably had a legitimate grievance. 

     Yes, you’re not supposed to let an assailant get within your immediate proximity, but (1) we were there to help those people and (2) we always searched them before letting them approach and (3) shouting to the villagers wasn’t going to complete the mission.

     When I was awarded my medal, I felt they were rewarding my patience, a commodity always on short supply in a war zone.

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     Older and a civilian, I am always amazed that I can’t do it anymore. When people oppose me and show disrespect, I bridle. My brain won’t function. I can’t be unendingly reasonable anymore. “Works well with others” employers write on my evaluation, but only if the others value my opinion. When people treat me like an old duffer, I want to take them apart.  

     There it is.

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